June 22, 2006

I heart Stephen Colbert

Posted in Politics at 9:06 pm by Nova Newcomer

This is starting to hit the rumour mill and since I want to stay above the fray, I will just come right out and say it, "I heart Stephen Colbert, but my marriage to P-Bak is still *awesome*." But back to my man, Stephen. Peat and I have arranged an "out" clause that would allow me to annul our marriage if Stephen Colbert wanted me to become his full-time "correspondent." (The truth about why I use so many quotes in my writing is a whole 'NOTHER post! So is my usage of capitals and incorrect grammar.)

But then again, would I take the out if it was given? I think that would depend on if Stephen made the eagle part of the deal, if you know what I mean. And would our bed be shaped like a capital C, too? And would I have to refer to him as "Lincolnish" in private conversations as well? The more I think about it, the more it makes sense that Mr. Colbert remain the giant celluloid elephant in the corner in my marriage — that is, if he doesn't pick a fight with Russell Crowe. Don't stand in throwing distance of a telephone, Stephen!

In all seriousness, Stephen Colbert is my latest political obsession — he's got the brains of a wonk, but the wit of …well, someone who doesn't get turned on by Martin Sheen giving speeches as the fake President. But what's a girl with a political science degree to do in her spare time?

No, really, I am getting serious this time folks. It's about time someone had the courage (and I don't say this in the Republican, ridiculous C-O-U-R-A-G-E way) to beat them at their own game. Sure, he probably won't turn anyone against the dark side, but we will have a little bit more fun licking our wounds through the rest of this Bush presidency.

Thanks for the heart, Stephen.


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